I have learned one thing in my brief hiatus from you.
We could bring down the worlds super powers simply by withholding caffeine.
Captain Handsome accidentally bought me caffeine free diet Pepsi this week. My free fall through withdrawal hell until I realized what I was drinking has been interesting.
Two days into this I began to experience headaches and a general disdain for life. I know why you're thinking. You're thinking, Mommyhood, you always have headaches and a disdain for life. Yes, but I don't usually have a disdain for ALL life. See?
Three days into it and I cannot keep my eyes open and have dizziness that would rock any sinus activated vertigo I have ever experienced.
So today I realize, Holy Hell, Captain Handsome, caffeine free!
Let me tell you something about my pilot. This man does everything with me and the kids in mind, He is the most selfless and loving man and he would literally die for all of us, no joke. When he purchased said caffeine free beverage, he did it because I have type two diabetes and he wanted it to be good for me. This is the very same man who bought me a multivitamin (because I am severly immune compromised) handed it to me this morning and said, "here, take this, I love you."
This man is my world.
So now that I have downed an extra strength five hour energy, berry flavor, equivalent of 12 oz of coffee in caffeine content, I am seeing the humor in my caffeine addiction. This is an addiction I do not plan to quit.
But as most blogging mamas, it got me to thinking.
Yeah, I was thinking. What of it.
Anyway, it got me to thinking about the worlds super powers, as naturally caffeine withdrawal would.
What it.....what if, tomorrow, there was no more caffeine.
The interwebs sight caffeine withdrawal symptoms as:
-headache
-fatigue
- dizziness
- lack of concentration
- depression
- flu like symptoms
As a side note- dizziness was my favorite, literally rendering me non functional.
Anyway, with our currently nuclear armed world, take my assumption that suddenly the world has no caffeine.
Apply above symptoms to:
Obama, Putin, Ahmadinejad, Kim Jong II.
How long before someone pushes the button?
How long before someone misplaces the cancellation codes?
How long before we reeeeaaallly fuck up as a society and get rid of term limits and reelect Obama?
This blog was meant to be funny but in actuality, our caffeine dependence is anything but.
Now pass me my damn diet Pepsi.
My drugs of choice.
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